Music team to the next level

A lot of things happened yesterday- we had the sunday service in the morning, and i led the praise and worship. I was supposed to go on duty in the afternoon but i decided to take a leave to be able to attend our music ministry general meeting at 5 pm...and since i had a lot of free time, i also attended our monthly inter-church youth gathering from 2-4:30 pm, this time hosted by the church in casiaman.i don't know why the others do not enjoy it, but for me, our interchurch youth gatherings always give me a light, happy feeling, especially when i get to bond with our fellow youth from other bacnotan churches. while it's true that most parts of the service were delivered in ilocano which i don't really understand that well, i still enjoy just being there in the spirit of fellowship, no pressures attached, as if we were just a group of young people who decided to gather together that sunday, to praise God, and to learn more about Him. A bible study with all the parts of a service would probably be an adequate description for it:). But now as i think about it, maybe the others who do not enjoy attending aren't pleased with the informality of the gathering, or with the format of the service, since it is similar with our individual sunday services in our respective churches. But on second thought, it won't probably be as fun if it wasn't informal, although we should still strive for excellence in anything and everything we do for God. The bottomline is those who really want to take part could and would always find a reason to attend, and the otherwise goes for those who aren't really interested.

Back to my itinerary for yesterday, the highlight of the whole day was our general meeting, which was the main reason why i went on leave. The service was of course, great, but our meeting has been highly anticipated for weeks so it's really my favorite part. Pastora Belinda facilitated the meeting and she checked on the status of each of the subministries under music- Tambourinees, JAM (instrumentalists), and VIA (worship leaders/back-up) in which i am a part of. A lot of things were clarified- our individual status as members, the commitment of present and absent members, work discipline, punctuality on practices and call-times, and so much more. The breakthrough among all those we've discussed was kuya erick's idea to create a gmail account where we could post the monthly line-up of songs and music teams, schedules and concerns of anyone, new songs-lyrics, chords, and mp3s, etc. for everyone's convenience. All of us agreed and i am personally excited about it. May God bless this project so that we could all successfully use it for His greater glory:). We will also set a schedule for our monthly devotion where we could be renewed and filled with the spirit by sharing the word of God and praying for one another.

I am really so excited for the church! i don't know what plans God has for me with regards to my employment opportunities but i'm happy to see all these and be a part of this great beginning for all of us. and i'd just do whatever i can at the moment. thank you Lord! unto You be all the glory!

My Wonderful Weekend:)

It was thursday night (June 17) when ate jonna informed me that trix won't be available to worship lead the following sunday (yesterday); while she, had been advised not to strain her voice, and being the worship leader last sunday, she can't do it consecutively, leaving me as the only choice, if I was available. There are really 4 of us who take turns in worship leading every sunday service but ate michelle had just given birth so calling her in would be out of the question. I, on the other hand, have told her early on that I would be able to attend church on sunday but not worship lead or even serve as back-up as i was still coughing, though infrequently, at that time. There was one sunday that I wasn't really in my best shape but I still led the praise and worship, and there was one moment there when I thought my voice would really break so I vowed never to do it again. I believe God would understand, knowing that He always wants the best for me especially in terms of my health, and I know that He would rather hear me singing praises to him on many other sundays/other days,  than have me sing that one last time due to unnecessary sacrifices. I know I sound over-acting and so dramatic right now but you get my point, don't you?haha..anyway, back to the story, I really felt ambivalent when I received that text message from her asking me 'Pwede ka ba? Wala n kasing iba.'..Thinking about my recent cough/colds, I wanted to say no at first; but in truth, i really wanted to say yes. I actually miss going to church and worship leading as well. I believe that singing is my gift, and my mode of worship to God. Sometimes, it's even easier for me to sing than think about what to say in prayer. I also believe that to really belong to a church, you must be an active part of it, because for me, your membership in the church ends the moment you lose concern for it-its members, activities, and affairs in general. but i'm fortunate to have reached that level wherein i no longer let the disappointing events in church affect my own relationship with God..but i guess i should be talking about that some other tym..haha...so after praying, and believing that God has healed me completely, and that He would provide everything we needed for His greater glory, i ended up saying yes, at the same time asking ate jonna to make the song line-up as i was still on hospital duty at that time.

the next day, friday, the weirdest thing happened to me. I woke up at around 8:30 am, had my devotion, then played computer games. when i got bored, i decided to just rest on the sofa while watching tv, then after a few minutes, i suddenly felt cold with my muscles and joints starting to ache. i also felt the same way the last time i had fever so i took my temperature, and it was actually 37.9 degrees celsius. sinat lng naman so i didn't really worry, but i took paracetamol just the same because my sister micah and i were supposed to watch the final installment of shrek movies that afternoon.I also asked micah to pray for me and she asked me 'ate ung sa sarili ko lang ba o ung sinasabi?'..haha..but she prayed for me loudly just the same. after 30 minutes, i actually felt better but when i rechecked my temperature, it suddenly went up to 38.8. I waited for a few more minutes but it won't go down so i decided to take a bath to release excess body heat. It worked:) and micah and i just had instant chicken noodles for lunch to save time. We were rushing and all only to find out that the movie was no longer showing. ang sabi ko sa sarili ko, siguro sabi ni Lord, 'pinagaling na nga kita maglalakwatsa ka pa.'..haha..so we just decided to stay home and watch a different movie, the tear jerking 'my sister's keeper'. Later that night, my fever went back and i had to sleep in pajamas, socks, covered with two blankets because i really felt cold. i was thinking about church practice the next day and i wasn't so sure if i could do it so i simply asked ate jona to have somebody else do it, but if there isn't anybody, i asked them to just pray for my healing.
the next day, saturday, i felt so much better, and i should after 12 hours of sleep:) i also had my period starting that morning so i thought the fever was maybe due to the one-day delay of my period due to stress from 8 days of incomplete sleep. i was even happier to see dong and ambet finally join us once again, so for the first time in weeks, we had a complete set of instrumentalists, with anna on keyboard, wapo on drums, ambet on guitar, and dong on bass guitar. The practice went well and i had my duty in the afternoon from 3-11 pm.
being the worship leader, i woke up early the following day (sunday), had my morning prayer then prepared myself. it was also father's day and my sisters and i prepared a card for papa, which according to him, made him cry:). the service went great and we had a hearty lunch at the monsoon party of the barley group headed by tito chito. I also got to chat with my friend cathlyn whom i haven't seen since christmas break. at first i wasn't so sure whether to go on duty or to just rest at home that afternoon but thank God responsibility won and i went on duty. It was a busy 8-hour duty, with only 4 of us in our group who came but as i always say, it's when the going gets tough that i get to learn a lot of things especially in terms of time management, increasing speed in doing things while at the same time making sure that i don't commit any mistake, whether of omission or commission. I thank God for another great week He has given me, for Father's day, for my papa who's the best father for me and my sisters, for church, for friends, for delicious foods, for work, for funny and helpful companions, and for all the innumerable blessing He has given, and is giving me.

ps..this is a delayed post. there was no internet signal yesterday, and i was too tired to finish this blog last monday...i would probably agree to worship lead again for this coming sunday..so help me God. Good day everyone..meow!

Keeping the Good Fight of Faith

It's been weeks since I last read my Bible and spent time for devotion. It was, undoubtedly, my fault. I could blame it on my schedule, work, feeling always tired, having so many other things to do, etc.but in my heart, I always know that my priorities are always up to me no matter how many other factors affect me. I lacked time for it because I didn't give time for it, instead, I placed more importance on other things. But this morning, I decided to allot time for it and I'm so glad I did. There's really no better advice than that which comes from God, revealed to me through His Word. At first it felt like I was trying to read it, but after praying, it already felt natural, and I felt open, ready to absorb the wisdom that only comes from God.
I was led to Hebrews 11:1 which says ' Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see'; v. 8 also says that 'without faith, it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.' The entire chapter further talked about the people of God who led lives of faith. I personally love Abraham's story, who followed God and left his comfortable home to live in the land God has promised for him. It wasn't all abundant when he lived there, and He could've easily gone back to his home, but because he believed in the great and mighty things God has planned for Him, he stayed, longing for a better, heavenly country that could only come from God. He died not receiving all the things promised; 'he only saw them and welcomed them from a distance' but even in his death, he was contented, with his firm, unwavering faith that all the things God has promised, will come to pass in His time.
I don't know if I would be able to reach the same level of faith as theirs but each day, I keep on praying, trying, and hoping that my faith will always remain strong, growing as I grow in my relationship with Christ. Just a few minutes after my devotion, I called up a hospital for a training program I was applying for. I still lacked one of the requirements, an IVT license, and although I've already applied for it, it's common knowledge that it usually arrives 2-3 months after or longer. The training's scheduled to begin on September and I was told that if the license doesn't arrive by the 2nd week of August, I could no longer join the training. I was so excited for it, so positive that I would be able to make it, but for a moment there, I felt the facts slapped in front of my face, telling me to stop hoping, putting me down.Until I was reminded that nothing is impossible with God; that faith without action is dead; that for as long as I do my best to make it, then I would have no reason to be guilty about it; that if things don't happen the way I want them to even though I've given it my all, then God has another, much better plan for me. It was a simple test of faith. I may have failed many times, but I've also succeeded many times more than I failed. I pray that my application has already been submitted and processed, with the license ready for release soon. I need a miracle, and there wasn't a day in my life that God did not give me one so my fingers are crossed, my heart remains hopeful, and my faith remains strong, with full trust in the Lord that for as long as my life is His, everything will be great and wonderful in the end.:) Thank you Jesus, thank you Father God, thank you Holy Spirit! I love you! and all these I pray in the mighty name of Jesus, amen.

Rest...finally:)

Well it isn't my off yet, but I've seen my schedule for the next 15 days this morning, and starting tomorrow, my duty will be from 3 pm-11pm:). That means no more waking up early nor staying up until morning, and so much more sleep for me:) Even when I was still in college, 3-11 has always been my favorite shift in terms of getting enough rest while still being able to finish all the requirements. I like 7-3 because it's the busiest shift, and it's when the going gets tough that I feel I learn a lot of things about the job. I never liked 11-7 shift, for aside from the reason that it ruins my circadian rhythm, I don't think I could learn anything and remember it when I was so focused trying to stay awake. And now that I'm no longer a student, I would've wanted to stay at the 7-3 shift forever except that I really need to rest right now. I've been working for four straight days now, immediately after our trip to Manila and I haven't had an eight-hour sleep for days. My off will still be on the 18th but at least starting tonight I could already have long hours of sleep. Sleep has always been on top of my physiologic needs, sometimes even more important than food. My late Mama Josie used to reprimand me for taking eating for granted just to have a nap. She would always wake me up no matter how stubborn I am, and she always proves herself right at the end, when I finally concede and eat, not a little, but a lot..haha. All of us siblings are blessed with amazing sleeping skills:). Insomnia was rarely, if not never a problem for us, and our cousins always commend us for our special ability of sleeping in any vehicle no matter how uncomfortable our positions are, or how steep or rocky the road is. Also, Ate Angel and I have this bad habit of over-eating, aka stress-eating, whenever we lack sleep. On the other hand, we sometimes use sleep to prevent ourselves from eating since when you're asleep, you don't think about food or get hungry easily, but you still get to lose some of your calories. Well, if you will look at me and ate angel as 'sleep models', the message you'll probably get is that you lose not much calories really for had it been a lot, we would've been slimmer:). Knowing that, another message you would probably get is that we care more about sleep than our appearance. Physiologic needs, after all, are of higher priority than self-esteem needs:)

Now all this talk about sleep seems to make my body long for it even more, the same way I salivate just at the thought of any of my favorite foods:).  But I guess I'm actually starting to love blogging more than sleep, trying to stay awake right now to finish this and postpone my most coveted rest. blogging vs. sleep..and the winner is sleep..my body won! My eyelids are drooping right now so nyt for now! By the way I love my new header! I made it last night and it's quite a product of rigorous editing so I just wanna say I love it as congratulations to myself! nyt again! meow meow

My Happiest Jollibee Escapade

I had a full day today:). Right after my duty which ended at 3 pm, papa and micah fetched me from the hospital so we could go buy her school supplies and eat out as well. I actually felt like a child a while ago, so excited to go to jollibee, as if going there for the first time..haha. But really, it's been a very long time since I last ate at jollibee, and we were actually visiting a new branch in san fernando for the first time so i had enough reason to feel all fidgety along the way, unable to stop smiling:). and i wasn't disappointed..hah! i ordered my favorite jolly spaghetti, jolly hotdog, jolly cone twirl, jolly large, then xl fries (shared with papa and micah), and jolly coke:) those who know me well are very familiar with my superb appetite and i definitely did not fail those who believed in me as i ate a while ago..waha! then just as we were heading for the parking lot, i asked papa when are we going back. he just smiled but it probably won't be soon since that branch is the farthest food chain from home and we usually eat at mcdo after buying groceries on sundays. even so, my first jollibee (sevilla branch) eat-out with my family will be one of my most cherished gastronomic escapades..for though it's fastfood, it definitely is good food that touches the heart- my heart:)

my sister micah asked me what's the other name for those bright reflectors on the road that glow at night. she was watching who wants to be a millionaire and that was one of the questions. and i told her they're called cat's eye, because cats (due to infrared something in their eyes) see better at night than they do at daylight, in the same way those reflectors help drivers see the road clearly at night. Back to real cat's eyes, they're actually related to the major reason why i don't like cats. I may be named katy (sounds like 'catty'), but i never felt like i could be close to them. I DON'T TRUST CATS. for me, they're like the most cunning, unpredictable animals. they're built for stealing, for attacking behind others' backs and I can't stand looking straight into their fierce slit eyes. the only cat i like is puss in boots (shrek version), i guess because he has round expressive eyes. but since people still link my name to them even though they know i hate them, i made good use of it and i've been signing my cards and informal messages with meow-meow (my personal version of a cat's face with 3 whiskers on both cheeks) for years now, especially when i don't want other people to readily know that it was from me. ...and that's the origin of my blog, CAT-HATER MEOWS:p
it's supposed to be my off tomorrow but i would go on duty to cancel out my absence last friday, my first for the month of june. i wish i could say it's for philanthropic purposes, but in truth, it's actually just part of a plan- i'm reserving my few allowable absences for my personal off days- days when i really can't find an inspiration to go for duty..haha..so nyt for now! meow-meow

I miss weekends:(, Independence Day, Filipino pride, etc.

Months ago, everyday seemed like weekend for me, with all the free time in the world to rest, watch my favorite shows, go to places, and simply do whatever I feel like doing. But since I started going on hospital duties, weekends, as in real weekends, suddenly became a rare opportunity for me. It's actually among the few things I don't like about being a nurse. I can deal with the flexible schedules, but how I wish no one would get sick on Saturdays and Sundays, especially Sunday! I feel so ambivalent each time I go on duty Sunday morning, being there in the hospital, knowing that God would understand why I missed church, but still wanting to have intimate fellowship with Him, together with my family and friends.
Last thursday and yesterday (friday), I was in Manila to apply for jobs. I still lacked one of the requirements but I will most probably come back soon to settle things. I'm so excited to finally have a job, and be compensated and respected for what I do. But my experience for those past 2 days felt like someone's telling me on my face that getting a great dream job wouldn't be that easy, especially in my chosen profession. Sometimes I wonder what if I didn't become a nurse, I would've easily gotten a job after graduation, but then, I still know deep inside that it isn't just about getting a well-paying job, but more about being happy about what I do, and earning a sense of fulfillment each time I help others through what I can do best, which is care for them and assist them about matters of health. With that said, I am actually happy with the way those past 2 days turned out. What's getting me really sad right now is the fact that I have duty tomorrow and I still have to go on duty on Monday, supposedly my off, in lieu of my absence yesterday...so practically I'll be going on straight duty for 6 days, that's if I'd be off on the 17th, since I haven't seen my schedule yet for the next 15 days.
Anyway, enough with those energy-draining concerns, it's independence day after all, and also ate kambal's, our helper, and my cousin ate thea's birthday!:) Hindi ko dama ang celebrations actually. It just felt like a regular holiday, in terms of national concern, as seen in the country's and individual preparations. In the US, they call their independence day thanksgiving, for it truly is a day every citizen should be grateful for. It is after all, the day we were all freed from colonization. But with us Filipinos, I don't know if our general lack of concern should be attributed to the fact that July 4 really is our true independence day, and then Pres. Diosdado Macapagal only made it June 12 to be different from the americans; or to a common feeling of being not really free; or to a plain lack of social concern. I remember back in college, I once talked about the lack of national pride among us Filipinos in our history class. We are not so proud of our being Filipinos, that's why we favor other countries over our own; that's why we settle for the mediocre, thinking that we could never measure up to the standards of other countries; that's why we care only about having a good life for ourselves and not for the entire nation; that's why many of us are willing to settle with just eating 3 times a day, that's why many students are contented with just finishing elementary or high school...and the long list of that's whys just goes on and on. This lack of Filipino pride has been present for so long that it has already been, unfortunately, part of our culture. It's interconnected with a lot of things, all negative I believe, and cutting it out of our system would consequently remove selfishness, mediocrity, and all the other innumerable problems that go with it. Being proud of one's self inspires one to be the best, not just to do enough, but to do great and wonderful things worthy of what one is able to do. Now, to be proud to be a Filipino, to belong to such a beautiful country with so many wonderful people full of intelligence and talent, that could surely raise us all up as one nation, shine above all the rest, and make everyone know that we have what it takes to be the best in this world. whoah! bongga! But seriously, i know it's easier said than done. And it will take all of us, not just one person, all of us Filipinos to make it happen. Happy Independence Day! Long live the Philippines and thank God I'm a Filipino!
It's already late and I still have duty early tomorrow morning, but I just can't sleep over the extraordinary talents of our fellow Pinoys shown in the grand finals of pilipinas got talent, can I? I also have so much to write about but I'll surely have more time for that. After all, tomorrow's another day...and for me, it would surely be another day of surprises, great things, and God's blessings! nyt! meow

Hoping for the Best

It's my off day today, having spent three straight duty days in the hospital...i had planned to do so many things for today until tomorrow, one of which is to post as many entries here as i could, but God seemed to have other plans for me. My uncle who asked for my credentials roughly a month ago sent me a message to go to Manila asap and apply personally for the job i was hoping to get. And since Manila's 7-hour travel from here, i would also take the time to apply in other hospitals where i would want to work. So instead of sleeping, i spent the day preparing my portfolio. We would probably leave tonight according to my father because he still has work to do. Thank God because I could still catch the final episode of Glee season 1 in a little while..

It's actually my very first time to apply for a job. I don't know what they will ask me during the interview but I pray that I would be able to answer them all excellently. Most of all, I pray that I would get the job in the institution that's right and would be beneficial for me, in terms of experiences, my principles, and financial needs as well:), though that's the least of my concerns right now. I've been wanting to truly practice my profession (and be compensated for it) since I graduated last year, to hone my skills and finally gain adequate experience to be able to take a master's degree not just for the sake of having one. Some of my batchmates have enrolled in post-graduate studies immediately after passing the board, having a hard time getting a job, but I prefer to have it while working, so I could have something to share beyond what I've learned in my four years in college.
Someone said that when things do not happen according to what you've planned, it's actually divine intervention working:). I thank God for all these opportunities. I continue to pray for His will to be done in my life and as I put my whole trust in him, I'm sure that greater and better things are yet to come.:)

Wonderful Beginnings

Someone said that the hardest part of any work is starting and ending it. Well starting this blog isn't really work 'work', but looking back to the days I've planned and thought about doing this- what to write about, how often should i write, how would I want it to appear, and so on..it actually seemed like i was taking this all too seriously. I first heard about blogging back in college, and although it appealed to me, I wasn't comfortable about the fact that anyone could just read it. It's not like I've convinced myself that a lot of people would be interested (haha:), but I still preferred keeping my thoughts just to myself, probably because i was so much of an introvert back then. Apparently, I've had a change of heart about blogging recently. Thru my younger/est sister who had a school project on blogging, I learned about this site. My older/eldest sister also suggested blogging to me a year ago, and she even recommended the blog of a friend of hers for my reading. But being the UP graduate, now law student that she is, her friend's blog somehow intimidated me with its serious, and socially contributory contents. Not that I'm an apathetic citizen of this country; I'm actually socially aware, concerned, and helpful in my own ways, but I really don't think I could consistently write about such influential, nationalistic, and 'superior' topics. I've just always been the simple sunny me..time and my experiences in college has made me come out of my shell little by little, but my positive disposition and the things I value most in life-family, friends, my values and my relationship with my God, they remain unchanged and they're what I write about. I also write about the causes I support at times but I couldn't be as serious. So that's how I doubted my ability to write a blog and I've somehow forgotten about it, until I've read one recently, and got inspired:). I was reminded not to put so much attention on what others, or even my sister might say, and treat blogging for what it really is, a medium for responsible self-expression, with the advantage of possibly affecting someone, in a good way i hope. 

so here i am, writing to my heart's content, finally relieved that i no longer have to send emails to an ad i just made up, somehow a desperate attempt of mine to be able to talk to someone, even if that's someone's imaginary. But i've really been writing since elementary. I once kept a diary, and still writes on my journal every now and then each time i have strong feelings and realizations i need to let out. My only problem about writing such is that i'm not sure to what or whom do i address them. At least here, whatever i write could be addressed to just anyone who would waste their time reading my logs..haha..a lot of things are racing through my mind right now I don't think i can write about them all..but now that i'm finally done with the hardest part, the rest would surely be easy. I'm so happy!!! Nyt! meow