Give up Gifts

Give up gifts/greetings to your friends and loved ones this Christmas to help victims of Typhoon Sendong.

Here's how (to Philippine Red Cross)
SMS
Text REDAMOUNT to 2899 (Globe) or 4143 (Smart)

G-Cash
Text DONATEAMOUNT4-digit M-PINREDCROSS to 2882

You can donate the following denominations:
Globe: 5, 25, 100, 300, 500 or 1000
Smart: 10, 25, 50, 100, 300, 500 or 1000

Even the minimum amounts of Php 5 or 10 would certainly go a long way. It's just a portion of what we load daily or weekly but it's life and survival for them. To give once would already be a great help but if we can give more, let's! Christmas after all, is about sharing love, joy and peace to others- not just to friends and family, but to our fellow Filipinos as well. And I'm sure your friend wouldn't mind missing your Christmas greeting on his/her phone if you have saved it for a better cause.

By the way, there are also other ways of giving, with many other groups and institutions lending help to those whose lives and sources of living were destroyed by the typhoon. Information on how to help are all over the  radio, television, and the internet. Let's all pitch in and lend a hand! We are more than blessed to be in the comfort of our homes, or planning our trips, reunions and parties with our families; and sharing is a wonderful way of showing our gratefulness to God for the safety and well-being that we enjoy. 

So what are you waiting for, spread the love!

Happy Birthday Micah!!!

This is my younger/est sister Micah...and she's celebrating her birthday today.

At 17, she still looks like a grade school student, but with God's grace, I can say that she has the wisdom that matches and at times surpasses her age. At 22, I'm too old to be her best friend so I just stick to the usual role of being an older sister. But she, on the other hand, has been more than a younger sister to me. She's been a very good listener, thought processor, helper, supporter, adviser, mojo booster, and so much more; especially at times when my maturity goes on hiatus and the unstable, undesirable part of my personality takes over. On top of being an obedient and loving sister to Ate Angel and I, she can also be the neutral, balancing force that could keep us from hurting each other whenever we would get into small fights, which unfortunately, may happen rarely to frequently depending on the season.

I don't think I've ever had an argument with her, because it's just usually one-sided (referring to myself). I haven't seen her get mad or irritated at me or at other people; she has always been sweet, kind, thoughtful and funny and we are so blessed to have her as our family's gem. We sometimes call her 'baby' which she does not like, but that's who she is to us. Maybe when she gets older, we'll be less protective, but until then, we'll still be her 'atribida' sisters who only want the best for her.

Micah, I don't know if you even read this blog but when you get the chance, I want you to know that we do love you very much and we'll always be here to support you and guide you the best way we can. Take the life lessons I share to heart, filtering them as well and combining them with the values we've been raised with, and the wisdom that comes from our Father God, continuously studying His Word and allowing yourself to be transformed with his refining power, through the tests and challenges that will be thrown your way.

There are so much things yet to be learned, but my wish for your birthday this year is for God to clearly reveal His will in your life, especially in terms of which career path to take. Whatever it is, we'll always be here to support you all the way. Have a joyful and blessed birthday!


Lots of love,
Ate Katy

I am a Nurse

I don't know how I can even begin to explain what writing means to me. It's something I obviously enjoy doing, but more than that, I think much of who I am now is because I write. It says much about my personality, that I do not like confrontations and talking much when my heart's bursting with emotions. The things I can't talk about, I write, and I thank God for this outlet that has kept me sane through the years.

But obviously, I am no serious writer. I just write for the sake of writing, although I've had good use of this talent in the past- in school, in a few competitions, and making family and friends feel good about the cards I give out to them on occasions.

Today, let me share an essay I made for an online competition that was shared to me by my sister. My attitude then was if I get the time to write then I'll join, but if I don't, then I won't. I had 30 minutes of my time free on the day before the deadline, and this is what came out of it.

(1) Category: Youth
(2) Title: Sharing My Peace in Being a Nurse
(3) Name: Katrina A. Paglicawan
(7) Nationality: Filipino
 (8) Age as of June 30, 2011: 21 years old
 (9) Gender: Female
(10) Word count: 766

not in a bun- with my co-trainees

I am among the many young Filipinos who joined the bandwagon of reluctant nursing students a few years ago, initially, out of obedience to my parents. It was never in my list of dreams, but God had a greater plan; and although it took me a few years to realize that I am exactly where I am supposed to be right now, serving and taking care of patients as a full-pledged nurse, the truly inspiring, and life-changing process was worth the wait.

That process began as a third year nursing student with the opportunity to immerse ourselves in the hospital and community setting. Early on, I have been anticipating for it as one of our final major requirements, and in the practice of excellence, I was determined to do my best and learn all things essential to become the best nurse that I can be. My first patient had a case of lung cancer, much like the case of my mother, who died a year ago at that time. The danger for counter-transference with such a background was great, but I was able to take control of my mind and emotions, not letting it affect my dealings with my patient. Still, perhaps at the back of my mind, I was doing my best not only to get high grades, but also to make up for the lost opportunity of being able to take care of my own mother when she needed me. I studied hard, making sure that I knew the rationale behind everything I was doing, and I stayed by my patient’s side, aiding her in things she cannot do for herself, providing health education as well as care and compassion, addressing not only her physical needs but also her emotional, mental and spiritual concerns as the need arises. Her every “thank you” was like a pat in the back from my mother, and for a nursing student like me who only ‘does her job’, it was true joy to have offered service and to be appreciated for it. My patient went the extra mile though; she, in her weak state, made the effort of commending me to my peers, praising me and boasting of the job well done I was able to accomplish in her eyes. It was my first milestone as a healthcare provider, and it was more than the motivation I needed to press on toward becoming the best nurse that I can be- excellent, hardworking, caring, compassionate and sincere.

Health, however, is a universal need involving all the aspects of humanness. Healthcare therefore, is not only for the sick, but must be offered to all people, transcending the boundaries of physical state, social status, race, and gender. The second milestone in my realization process was when we were immersed in small communities in the far, high mountains of Benguet. Their health needs did not match with the complexity of the cases we handle in the clinical setting, but the solutions, no matter how simple, were just as important. That experience opened my eyes and heart to the importance of my profession- that we are not only nurses aiding the sick and giving medications; we are also teachers, counselors, movers, initiators, and leaders, and the boundaries of what we can be for those whom we serve are vast, guided only be our professional code and our desire to help people achieve their highest potential in health. Not all the people we encountered welcomed us. Many were reluctant, and there were those whose beliefs did not agree with mine. It was a tough challenge, but it reinforced my vocation as a nurse, not only for the people who immediately accept me or who have the same guiding principles as mine, but for all.

The merit of my story is not in its uniqueness or complexity. Rather, it is in the sincerity of what I have been through, what I have learned, and what I have become as a person. The “life-changing” in my story is not in the appreciation or the awards I have received. It was in seeing the same change in the lives of the people I serve, with every piece of knowledge shared, and every caring action taken. In the few years that I have been practicing as a professional nurse, I no longer do my best just in the practice of excellence; I toil hard, patiently and perseveringly to see that change, and to share the peace that I have found in choosing my profession, understanding full well that every life blessed, is a portion of the world improved.


I had reservations in joining at first, with no intense experience in mind that I could write about with so much ardor. Again, it was my sister who gave me the idea and even though I was reluctant at first, I found the ideas just flowing spontaneously as soon as I began. And I was happy with my work, although I already wanted to change the title as soon I submitted it...haha

I am always proud to be a nurse but sometimes, when circumstances seem so bleak and hopeless, I think of becoming something else, something not so far, which is to become a doctor. I know I've found my niche in the healthcare profession and I am happy to take on the role of a nurse as part of the team, but things do get really tough at times and it's very easy to think of a way out. After all, 'to be a pediatrician' is what you'll find in my high school yearbook in the space beside ambition. I've also shared the many things I want to do in a previous post and being a doctor is one of them. There are limitations I have to live with but I just know that if it's meant to be, it will happen even many years later. Also, my motives in desiring to be one are sometimes questionable even to myself (and I'm not sure if it's safe to spill it all here)...haha...so for now, I am living life the way I've chosen to, choosing to serve and do my part in this world as a nurse. And whatever other careers I may venture into later in life, I will always be foremost, a nurse, and I am glad and grateful to be one.

I have not given up :D

This victory's so sweet and so fresh I can still taste it...haha

All-Saint's Day 2011

Finally, thank God for another opportunity to blog!

I've only been browsing other sites and reading other blogs these past weeks, wanting but not really having the strong urge to update my own. But that's not to say that my life has been lacking some action these past days because on the contrary, it's really a season of turning points for me so much so that I have become sick. Praise God that I'm feeling better now, and I praise Him more for the successes and overwhelming blessings He has flooded upon me once again.

So to start this catching up, here are photos of our very short 'long-weekend' vacation in La Union!

Through the years, All Saint's Day has become a special time for our family, commemorating first, Mama Susie, then Mama Josie's fruitful lives. They are always in our hearts and minds and we do visit them on other occasions, but we are joined by relatives and family friends in remembering them every 1st of November so it becomes a reunion of some sort for us. It's also Ate Angel and Micah's semestral break and it was good to come home and be with Papa at the province once again. I had a 5-day leave at the office, starting on October 31st but we had to go home on November 2nd already because of Micah and Ate's enrollment on the 3rd. So it was just a  total of 3 days for me including the 7 hour travel forth. It was very tiring for me, I must admit, because without Ate Kambal around, I had to do the cooking and some chores at home and we also tried to squeeze in as much activities as we can such as doing some groceries, going to the bank, the market, etc....haha...adult stuff should be banned on vacations, especially on SHORT vacations!

Thank God for some special moments- we ate out of course! (Ate Angel's treat) at the new Pancake House in San Fernando, we met up with childhood friends and neighbors, and our Tita and one of our cousins also came by our house before we went to visit Mama altogether.  

And as always, we did not return to Manila empty-handed. We had half a sack of rice and a box of banana plantains in tow together with other foods we could stock in our refrigerator...haha

I'm guessing that going home for vacation is bound to get harder and harder in the years to come. But family time is always worth the sacrifice so okaay lang kung pagod...haha
But I really hope to get a happy vacation next time around, because though it was certainly happy, I'm not sure if it was vacation:) Whatever it was, thank you Lord! I am grateful!

I have so many thoughts running in my mind right now I don't even know where to begin.

Life is indeed full of surprises, and I've reached that point in my life again when major decisions have to be made. It would be a turning point in my career, but I realized, it isn't just about me and my work. It's also about my family, my time, my salary, my daily living, my goals in the future, and how it would affect the different networks of my life as a whole.

I also can't qualify exactly how I feel- I'm excited, a little doubtful, but praise God, I find myself most grateful...-For changes, for choices, for the ability to make decisions, and for this overwhelming assurance that I have, that  God is at the center of this all. His thoughts and ways are higher than mine, and I can only stand in awe at how all these- MY LIFE- would turn out in his Hands.

Father God, it's another time of serious discernment and contemplation and you know I'm not very good at this.  Let your wisdom be upon me that I may know your will in my life because where you want me, is where I want to be. Let all the concerns and considerations just fade in the background as you allow the clear revelation of your will to stand out for my understanding.

I offer the days, months and years to come in your hands. As always, I just know that with You on the wheel, everything will be more than alright in the end.

Toggle Repeat

here's a song that just made me smile and feel giddy all of a sudden:)

it kept me awake at work last night...and it's still keeping me awake until now, 12 hours later when I'm in dire need of sleep...

the music and lyrics are so soothing, and perfect for Off/Rest/Solitude days like this...

and somehow, I feel like I'm singing this for someone, or I want someone to sing this for me...someone who has not revealed himself to me yet...

I'm such a believer of destiny and God's will and with sweet sounds like this filling my ears every now and then, I would just probably wake up one of these days, with the realization that the hopeless romantic in me's back,

and in full force:)

Have a restful and peaceful Friday!

MAAAAP

this isn't a map....it's a MAAAAAAP!

hanggandaaaa

i'm so adding this on my wish list!!!!

I just gotta shaaaare thiiiiis!

thanks to my CG mate Jeli for sharing this on facebook:)
God bless & have a wonderful Sunday!

I Wanna Be a Master Minesweeper (take2)

A few days ago, my dream of becoming a master minesweeper finally took off with this win...

I was so happy!!! and totally surprised as well...haha...I could no longer keep count of how many tries I make in a day...as in...it's as if every spare I time get while on the computer is spent on Minesweeper- even in between page loads...haha; so you can just imagine the smile on my face when I actually won the expert category for the FIRST time...the beginner and intermediate categories were mediocre (yabang!)..haha...but this one just couldn't be dealt with with pure analysis and intellect (that's just for myself:), luck should also be on your side, and it's been out of my grasp for weeks now that I was already praying, "Lord, give it to me please, even just one win..."haha

And true enough, it was a ONE time, BIG time WIN. I would've wanted to post this immediately but a part of me, yes the prideful one, wanted to prove to myself that it wasn't a shot at the moon and that I could go on a winning streak.

Since you're seeing just one picture, I don't think I even need to tell you that my hopes were crushed as I'm back to my trying self. But my prayer was answered and so if ever one day magkaroon ng payabangan sa minesweeper, I can proudly say that I finished it (without delving on how many times I tried and how many times...or time I won it..haha)

But I'll keep on trying, especially because this game really teaches me to be careful. It feeds on my OC-OC tendencies but it also helped me deal with my very poor hand grip issues. Focus is the key, so what I'm practicing on now is the habit of focusing on the things I'm holding in my hand, taking care not to accidentally release them from my grasp.

And that's palusot 101, the in denial me trying to reason out for my weird attachment to minesweeper.

But I'm still gonna keep trying, for lesser times in a day I hope, and when I finally become an EXPERT in the real sense of the word, I'll let the whole world know:)

Fasting and Feasting

After a 7-day hibernation from social media, I am back!

It was self-imposed, yes; but not without good reason. It's the season of fasting in FCF once again and I gladly and thankfully participated with the week-long communal prayer and fasting.

A week-long prayer and fasting could be overwhelming at first. In truth, difficult would be an understatement especially the first time I tried it a few years ago. I've always chosen the one-meal a day fast (yes, I eat just but one meal) because I don't think I can keep up with the water only or liquids only fast with my studies and hospital duties then, and now with my work and other activities. On the other hand, to give up just one meal isn't much of a sacrifice for me because I'm used to skipping meals when I've overslept or I've eaten more than usual from the previous meal. After 3 years of doing it though, I still haven't really been doing it the way I would've wanted. I keep my body hydrated with water all throughout the day to ward off hunger until it's time to eat, but the hunger pangs are really difficult to bear. As a result, I end up binge-eating on that supposedly 'normal' mealtime. I'm a work in progress though, and comparing how this one went with the other ones I did in the past years gives me a reason to thank God for the big improvements. I still eat more than the usual meal, as if trying to store food that could last me for the next 24 hours, but I have greater control this time. I relied more in the strength that comes from God and His Word, with the aid of nutritious foods, Vitamin C, Vitamin B complex, and Iron supplements. And even with my work schedule and the unpredictable weather we had this week, I am free from any sickness or disease, praise the Lord!

I wasn't able to get a copy of the prayer and fasting manual that was used by the church for this year so I went back to my consecration manual from last year and made good use of the the past 7 days, repenting and offering myself back to God. It was a renewing experience for my mind, heart, spirit, and my body as well because I've always believed that it's when I'm weakest that God is strongest.

But the miracle I received from God that really left me in awe in the past days was the discovery that all the faith goals I declared and prayed for last year have all been answered by our gracious, merciful and loving Father. I had them all written in a small piece of paper and when I found it and read through it, I couldn't help but smile and feel 'kilig' upon realizing that they have all been answered!!!

I'm still growing in my faith and walk with the Lord and I'm not sure if what I have at present is the correct mindset for prayer. I pray to my Lord to talk to him, to experience His presence and know Him more, to ask for forgiveness for the sins I've committed, to thank Him for all the marvelous things He has done for me, to ask for our needs, and some wants, including the deepest desires of my heart. Especially in a time of prayer and fasting, I am expectant for answers from him, holding on to his promise that if I ask anything in prayer, I only have to believe that I have received it, and it will be given to me. When exactly? I have no idea. I have my pleadings but I also know that God knows better. There is a time for everything and because it is a blessing from him, I just know that when it comes, it is the perfect time. I may argue with his will in my heart sometimes, but I have full faith that he will grant it in his own perfect terms; and if he doesn't, it's maybe because it isn't right for me, and he's giving me something way better.

And it's not just because I'm at the receiving end that I let him call the shots. It's just that the past 22 years of my life has been a continuing testament of God's love for me and his faithfulness. I do not deserve any of it but He still gave it all to me and for me wholeheartedly. I could keep on living my life any way I want to, but ever since I've accepted him as Lord and Savior of my life, it really has never been the same. It's been a wonderful roller coaster ride with its own share of joys and trials, but always with Him, the end is always beautiful.

Those who do not believe probably would not understand. Some would even accuse me of not living my own life. But is it really my life to live? The answer is both a qualified yes and no. Yes because I am created a free being who makes my own choices and decisions. And no, because when I surrendered my life to God to receive his gift of eternal life, I also gave up my right to my life. I allowed Christ to graciously take the burden for all my sins, and with His death on the cross, he has bought my life with a BIG price. And so the life I have now, I live for God.

But it's actually more difficult than living my life as if I own it. The standard is Christ, in all his goodness and perfection; and when I look at myself, I see a hopeless sinner, who can do nothing good on my own. And so I thank God for His love that is greater than any sin I have or will commit in the future. He has enabled me to be victorious, with the power and strength that comes from him. And for the many sins I'm still working on (though they seem to be endless), I thank Him for his promise that I only have to humble myself, confess my sins and ask forgiveness, and He will cleanse me from all unworthiness.

Buti na lang talaga God looks at the heart because the only thing I can really offer to him is my desire to serve Him and worship Him with all that I am. Even though I failed and still fail for so many times, He's already pleased that I keep on rising from every fall with His grace, to try again...and again...and again...

The lines from this song (I Live, I Breathe by Jon Owens)- one of my favorites, best describes how I want to show my love and gratitude to my Savior...

Now I receive your grace

I receive your mercy

I wanna be like you, to follow your heart

And for me, it isn't enough to take your name

Accept your gift, and remain the same

I want to honor you and bless you all of my days

And so I keep on renewing my covenants and commitments with my Father each day, asking for forgiveness for all my sins, and the strength to fully turn away from them. God will not really gain anything with the 7 day prayer and fasting I did because He is God- and that just says it all. It is actually more for my spiritual growth, for the revelation of His will in my life, to know Him more, and to draw myself closer to Him...but with a hope and prayer in my heart that He delights in my offering of my praise...

Well, His overflowing blessings and answers to all my prayers are more than enough expressions of His love for me, especially on top of his greatest gift, his promise of eternal life. I hope to repeat this again next year or better yet, to do this more frequently (although for less than 7 days maybe...haha)

Grant me the strength each day Father to live my life the way you want me to. All that I am and all that I have, I offer back to you who is the source of all good things, may what you see in me give you joy and bring a smile on your face. Because to have you smile at me, is the greatest achievement I could probably ever have in this life...

Lots of love,

Katy:)

P.S. For now Jesus, I'm excited to eat and play again:)

Give Thanks with a Grateful Heart

The storm's out and the sun's shining so bright once again.
Typhoon Pedring was literally a thing of yesterday, having lasted for only a day...
It left some damage to our house and to ate's tummy (she claims that she now knows the feeling of getting stabbed:) but we are more than well, with a roof above our heads and strong walls that kept us safe, with more than enough food to fill our stomachs, and with the best company to spend a stormy no-electricity day with- each other...

Before we joked around, sang round songs and Christmas songs, and attempted to play Scrabble in the dark to enjoy ourselves, we remembered our loved ones and our fellow Filipinos in prayer...

...and once again, our hearts are overwhelmed with gratefulness for God's goodness and greatness in our family. Truly in God, being grateful is as natural as breathing because each day, He never fails to give us a million reasons and more to thank Him, and to love Him even more...

And so once again Father God, I give thanks with a grateful heart- for saving me, for your grace and mercy that you flood upon us each day, and for your love that is greater than any physical, emotional, and spiritual storm we may encounter. I love you, and I'm forever indebted to You for revealing yourself to me, and allowing me to experience the fullness of life each day in your presence.

Lots of love,
Katy

I Wanna Be a Master Minesweeper:)

...was momentarily just as sad as the yellow face above...9 mines?! just 9 mines! then I examined my right hand...it isn't sore or tired yet...I think I can play another round:)

This is my current obssession (exaggeration intended), although if I keep on losing or 'almost winning':), then the end will I guess be close to that because rarely do I give up on games I enjoy, especially on those that give me sooo much hope...haha

I thought 'I must really have a case of serious boredom' to enjoy it, but now that I've been hooked for weeks even in my busy-ness, it's really fun! I don't know anyone who thinks so too...haha... but fun is subjective anyway (defensive?! ang loser lang...haha)

I finished Tumblebugs after several months of playing and psp game Crash after more than a year so I can surely take my time with this. And when I win it, I'm gonna give my hand a relaxing massage then I'm gonna treat myself with a cup of Wendy's Frosty or whichever ice cream I fancy:)

Grabbed Photo Overload

Happy Birthday Julius! And thank you so much for the treat!
And it was so nice to have seen Bea plus Gerard, and Fatima again!

Thank God for occasions and photo-genius friends, I still get to have great photos without a great cam:)
We celebrated Julius' birthday at Aveneto, Trinoma last Saturday over dinner.
As usual I came home the earliest-10:15pm and I really thank God for the courage and strength I had that night. Peer pressure isn't just for teens, especially with the friends I have. Pressure kung pressure!
But of course I also know that they just want to spend more time with me. Sorry guys, I just could not make the compromise. I led the worship in our church, FCF, the next day and I'm so glad I did not party the previous night away:) Balance is the key. And yes, I'm so not spontaneous but I really value my commitments.

But thank you so much for the pictures! I love you guys!

The following photos were taken by my high school friend Toto and my bff for the longest time, Cathlyn (who also happen's to be Toto's girlfriend) using Toto's sosyal na camera:)

These one's are by Maru:)

Happy birthday again Julius!

Life is good with wonderful friends. Even peer-pressuring ones:p

Waiting and Holding On

This is one of the many personal reflection papers I arrive at whenever I feel down. And yes, I've been a little down inside these past days, seeing and hearing from and about people getting what they want, and what I've been wanting and praying for too. And no, I'm not in a poor/bad condition or stuck in an ugly circumstance I can't get out of. I am actually good and more than well, with so many reasons to thank God for...but I am still down...and I've learned that the only way I could settle this is to be honest with myself, to recognize the feeling to be able to let it go.


What do you think of the phrase 'Right Where I'm Supposed To Be'? While others use it as a cliche, I had to go through days of reflection to know and understand if this is true for my life. And just when I thought I had everything settled already, challenges come again, to shake me and remind me that life isn't about settling, but growing; and that God, the author of my life, is the only one who knows everything, and the only one I can hold on to.You would probably think that I take life very seriously; well not always, but this is one of the things I consider important.

When I started working, I was grateful but at the same time, I had my eyes set on something else. I thought it was a good thing, always having something better to look forward to. I had it all envisioned in my mind- the job I'd like to have, the post-grad studies I was gonna take, how I would go here and be like this after a certain amount of years. As they say, if you fail to plan, you plan to fail. But the Word of God tells me something different...

Proverbs 19:21
Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails.


Proverbs 16:9
In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps.

And now that my heart is troubled, it is only in You Father God that I can find strength, comfort, and refuge. When I am weak, when I have done everything I could, when all I can do is wait, praying and keeping on believing; You are the strong, almighty and all-knowing God who hears my prayers, and who knows and does what is best.

Lord, as the song goes, You are the strength of my heart and my portion forever. Help me to just hold on and mean it, because my own heart is failing me; but not what I want, but Your will be done in my life. Help me understand Father, and to wait patiently, as you reveal each day your great and wonderful plan in my life.
Give me the strength to train myself, taking heart that "there is a perfect time for everything", and replacing all the bitterness and envy in my heart with thanksgiving, for all the blessings you continuously give to me and my family.

And with a renewed Spirit each day, fill my heart with joy and gladness as I choose to thank, to believe, and to remember your goodness and faithfulness, always and forever in my life.

My security is in You Father God, and once again I offer all my plans, wants and needs into your loving hands; You whose wisdom is unfathomable, and whose love, grace, and mercy endures forever.

And once again, my personal reflection ended in a prayer to God. I always find talking to God better than talking to myself. That goes to say that I don't trust in my own abilities, God-given they may be, as they're mixed up with my own will and many other things, ugly stuff included. I'd rather go straight to the source of all wisdom and understanding and be enlightened with His Word, for while there's a huge chance that I'll fail myself, I know God will never fail me.

I may not be exactly where I want to be, but in God, I know I'm right where I'm supposed to be. I actually have so many things to thank Him for! After more than a year, I'll be taking on the commitment and challenge of leading worship in church once again. It's familiar ground but I still am nervous; but I'm also very excited, very blessed, and grateful to serve my God this way once again. It was actually a reminder that He knows exactly when to throw things at me, that He's got big plans and purposes in my life. It's just that my human heart sometimes (most of the time actually) fails to recognize that God's perfect time, no matter how long I have to wait, will prevail and when it does, it will just blow me away:)

Thank you so so much Father God. I entrust my entire life unto thy loving hands. Thank you for the privilege of knowing You. May You grant me the grace each day to wait on You, and to give glory to your name in everything I do. I love you so much and always and forever, I am yours! Please never let me go:)

Super Late Bday Celebration!

I meant that in two ways...

Last Friday, September 2nd, I finally had the chance to meet up with my high school friends for the birthday treat I owe them. It was almost a month late (real birthday's Aug 5th) because my weekends for the past weeks have been filled by unexpected work duties and other birthday celebrations. We had a blast, like we always do, whether we're celebrating anything or just meeting up for coffee, though this one's different because aside from my birthday celebration, it was also April's send-off as she's going to KSA very soon for work. Not everyone were able to come but nevertheless, we enjoyed the night because it's always fun to be with my long-time friends Julius, Cathlyn, April, Ging, Maru, and Maka:)

What was supposed to be an intimate dinner though proceeded to a late-night videoke party. Lumelevel-up na talaga kami...or baka ako na lang...haha. It was my first time to be out with them 'til past 2 am. I actually didn't want to come at first but peer pressure won...haha...and I'm glad I did! I didn't know we could sing continuously for such a long time, pwede na magconcert!:)

Now let me allow the photos taken by Maru, April, Ging (and whoever's free to take the pic) to tell the story...

 cake's mine, cupcake's April's- spell unfair...haha

At Mesa- SM Megamall

Special thanks to Julius for the cake! We loved it!:)

agawan ng mic at Music Match, Metrowalk

mic's for the celebrator

love;) thank you guys!

I've been friends with these guys for more than 10 years now (wow! that's half of my life already), and some of them I've been friends with even longer. For Julius and Cathlyn, I'm talking about a lifetime long...haha...Thank you so much for belatedly celebrating my birthday with me! The subjects of our conversations are improving already as they're starting to be penetrated by grown-up stuff; but some things never change...like, I still have to go home the earliest, only this time, literal na early na at past 2 am!

God bless April as you venture into unknown lands! I'll be praying for you and always remember that we're just a message away if you need a piece of home:) And to the rest of us, cheers to productivity, level-up hangouts, and a lifetime of friendship to look forward to! We miss the others! 'Til our next date! (re: Julius' birthday treat...haha)

Thank you Lord for great friends!

Reading List: The Best of Philippine Literature

Here's another of my random internet finds from Yahoo!. The teaser in the bulletin read "Pinoy Literature's Best Ten" and being the avid reader that I am, there was no way I wouldn't check this out.

The writer, Gel Galang, listed the following must-reads, all by Filipino authors, in an enticing feature I'm sharing below with anyone out there- non-Yahoo readers or busy-bee young pros who don't get to read much lately.

1. GAGAMBA by F. Sionil Jose

Why you should read it
Almost 10 years after its release, the stories of poverty, prostitution, and injustice still resound in our society today. Aside from the critical observations of societal affairs and the upper class, there’s also the jab at God, religion, and the ultimate question, “Why?”
The Bida
Journalists, landlords, politicians—basically the “beautiful people” killed in the earthquake. Their stories take centerstage in the eyes of Gagamba, the storyteller.
The Badass
Tranquilino Penoy a.k.a. Gagamba, a cripple who sells sweepstakes at the entrance of Camarin and a survivor of the earthquake.


2. THE TWISTED SERIES by Jessica Zafra

Why you should read it
If you’re a ‘90s baby, an Eraserheads fan, a tennis fan, a cat lover, or a true cynic with a sharp taste for zing and snap, Jessica Zafra’s Twisted series will surely make you take off your rose-colored glasses and opt for her thick-rimmed ones.
The Bida
Everything. Everyone. Anything, especially world domination.
The Badass
The author, who else?


3. ILUSTRADO by Miguel Syjuco

Why you should read it
An ambitious novel that prods into the Philippine history, lifestyle, and society. Its being awarded the 2008 Man Asian Literary Prize grand winner is practically just icing on the cake, but justly given.
The Bida
Miguel—namesake of the author, but a name that he insists is purely fictional. As the student of Crispin Salvador, Miguel takes it upon himself to uncover the mystery of his mentor’s death.
The Badass
Crispin Salvador, literary lion, womanizer turned recluse, who stays in New York to finish his final masterpiece.


4. MY SAD REPUBLIC by Eric Gamalinda

Why you should read it
Passion and the Filipino-American war didn’t seem to make an interesting read—until this novel came along.
The Bida
A love triangle between a rich girl, a poor boy, and a tisoy gold digger, minus the cliché of your typical telenovela.
The Badass
Asuncion Madrigal, rich, sugarcane hacienda heiress with an attitude. Even when she’s caught in a fierce love triangle with farm boy Isio Magbuela and the rich Tomas Agustin, she’s hardly the damsel-in-distress who’d get swept off her feet. If anything, she swept them off theirs.


5. SOLEDAD'S SISTER by Butch Dalisay

Why you should read it
Dalisay’s prose. Succinct, powerful, muted, restrained, vulnerable, simple, classic.
The Bida
Aurora Cabahug. While the casket labeled with her name arrives from Jeddah and opens the story, Aurora is, in fact, very much alive as a singer in a nightclub.
The Badass
SPO2 Walter Zamora, the cop tasked to reunite the deceased sister with her only living family. Instead of the pot-bellied, ticket-waving, megalomaniac officers that we immediately think of, Walter comes as a mild but pleasant surprise.


6. MONDOMANILA by Norman Wilwayco

Why you should read it
If you’re a fan of transgressive fiction, but want to see how Chuck Palahniuk’s Fight Club or Irvine Welsh’s Trainspotting would read in the context of Philippine society, this novel reveals the least expected, but most probable, place to find a cesspool of violence and obscenity—in one’s self.
The Bida
Tony de Guzman, the antihero in search of enlightenment.
The Badass
Tony’s thoughts and ramblings—the things he easily admits about himself—are those that most people would only say out loud on their deathbeds, if they ever would at all.


7. IN THE COMPANY OF STRANGERS by Michelle Cruz Skinner

Why you should read it
A follow-up to Balikbayan and Mango Seasons, this collection captures the essence of Filipino speech and chatter—even though it’s written in English.
The Bida
Choose from the characters of the 16 stories of migrant workers, families in the suburbs, teenage life, and more.
The Badass
Of all, Virgie in “Beautiful” stands out. Despite her fondness and affections for older foreigners that have a price, she does not think of herself as a prostitute.


8. NEWS OF THE SHAMAN by Karl de Mesa

Why you should read it
If you think you’ve seen the dirtiest, most fetid and putrid parts of our beloved city, these four novelas will take you for a ride with fading rock stars, druggie photographers, puppeteer politicians, and otherworldly creatures to a different Manila.
The Bida
Lucas the tripped-up photographer in “Faith in Poison” and “Angelorio.”
The Badass
Joaquin, the vocalist of Shadowland who committed suicide in “Bright Midnight.” Before you say “Kurt Cobain,” make sure to take in the unusual trips, the talking cars, and personal demons that come his way.


9. THE SKY OVER DIMAS by Vince Groyon

Why you should read it
It’s a story about a family straight out of a Jerry Springer episode—crazy dad, klepto mom, one dead brother, and another estranged one—but with the distinct flavor of Filipino craftsmanship.
The Bida
Rafael Torrecarion, the son who goes back to his hometown of Bacolod to bring his father out from his self-confinement in Dimas.
The Badass
George Torrecarion is the labeled local nutcase now rumored to be living with another girl in their hacienda. But he’s also the bearer of stinging truth about his family’s past.


10. THE WOMAN WHO HAD TWO NAVELS by Nick Joaquin

Why you should read it
A tragic story of a family where the mother and the daughter are constantly at muted war with each other, with only their men as their point of agreement and, ironically, disagreement.
The Bida
Connie Escobar, the woman who claims that she has two navels.
The Badass
Concha Vidal, if only for the fact that she got to her daughter’s husband first, and then gave her the spoils later on.

There's a lot of truth in what the writer said about "our local books seem-ing to have started collecting dust even in our own bookstores". I don't really get to buy as much books as I want to but reading doesn't have to equate with buying. Through friends and other connections, I find ways to read the books I fancy. Sadly though, they're mostly by foreign authors. I also have a list in mind of books I'd like to get for myself in time, but it has no Filipino authors included in it.

I've had the privilege of reading collections of Filipino stories back in college which was a gift from my sister. They were actually gifts- 2 books, both collections of stories by Filipino authors, one in Filipino and one in English. I read and enjoyed the Filipino book, but the one written in English seemed too hardcore for me, I think I was only able to read one story. It was more than a challenge to my vocabulary. I usually have the habit of looking up words I don't understand in the articles I read but with that book, either I was overwhelmed or I just wasn't interested at all. So aside from Noli and Fili, and the materials I had to read for my Philippine Literature subject back in college, my reading list is pretty much unpatriotic.  

Of the 10 books listed above, I've only had the chance to read some of Zafra's Twisted series. I've heard about the others in a trivial way, like something I've reviewed for a quiz bee..haha...but after reading the article above, I now have my eyes set on a few that roused my interest. I am not easily convinced by reviews, but they can charm me into trying to see for myself, to prove them either right or wrong based on my personal standards. When I was younger, I used to read anything I could lay my hands on, but the maturity that came with my age taught me to be vigilant with my choices, discriminating those that may not be good for me, overtly or discreetly. In the recent years, I found myself drawn to light, feel-good, yet wisdom-ful books. While I try to stay away from romance novels, they remain close to my heart. But what I've really been investing my time and my sight on these days are the Bible and other Christian books. I thank God for the faith, and for this longing in my heart to know Him more. May my eyes and thoughts give glory to your Name at all times. Let your Holy Spirit guide me in choosing my reads well, that, while I remain open, I may not invest my time and the knowledge and wisdom that comes from you, in understanding anything that could separate me from you.

So I'm keeping the list here, and hopefully I could cross them out one by one in the years to come. I'd probably won't get to read all of them in my lifetime (some of the subjects I particularly avoid or don't like), but this is my way of reminding myself to read more of books not just by Filipino authors, but especially those written in our native language as well.