I just finished Youversion's devotional plan by Joyce Meyer entitled The Power of Being Thankful, and indeed, I am very grateful for the nuggets of wisdom God has revealed to me once again through His Word.
The devotional reading on healing brokenness through gratitude struck me most especially, because it is very far from the standards of this world we live in. Carol, my officemate and friend, said that she is afraid for me and my future because she thinks I have the makings of a martyr based on how I approach situations, and how I react to those who have wronged me. She tells me that it's easy to forgive but not to forget. But I believe that they go hand in hand...because true forgiveness is not given only when the pain is gone..it involves the daily act of making the decision to give up one's entitlement to hurt back a person no matter how deserving he or she may be..
And it's definitely far from easy especially for a melancholic like me who is gifted with a good memory..hehe..One word I would use to accurately describe myself is 'mapagtanim' because my brain effortlessly stores memories of broken promises.
I've actually just been learning through practice the art of 'deliberate forgetting'- because I don't really forget, but each time I remember, I surrender my hurts to God and just allow Him to heal me with just the right antidote- a heart that chooses to praise and thank Him for what is left, over what has been taken away; with full trust and confidence in God, my healer, that He'd turn my mourning into dancing and my sorrows into joy. Carol would throw situations in marriage at me and would ask me how I would respond to test how far I can go. She was most fearful when I answered that where there is room for separation, there is room for forgiveness (I read this somewhere..hehe). Then I tell her, I really wouldn't know how I would respond until I get there..and I pray that I won't have to get there so I'm taking my time, praying for and discerning God's chosen partner for me. But in approaching all my relationships, I really pray that I would have the courage and the strength to forgive myself and others because let's accept it, no matter how much we try to be careful, we still fail.
I've actually just been learning through practice the art of 'deliberate forgetting'- because I don't really forget, but each time I remember, I surrender my hurts to God and just allow Him to heal me with just the right antidote- a heart that chooses to praise and thank Him for what is left, over what has been taken away; with full trust and confidence in God, my healer, that He'd turn my mourning into dancing and my sorrows into joy. Carol would throw situations in marriage at me and would ask me how I would respond to test how far I can go. She was most fearful when I answered that where there is room for separation, there is room for forgiveness (I read this somewhere..hehe). Then I tell her, I really wouldn't know how I would respond until I get there..and I pray that I won't have to get there so I'm taking my time, praying for and discerning God's chosen partner for me. But in approaching all my relationships, I really pray that I would have the courage and the strength to forgive myself and others because let's accept it, no matter how much we try to be careful, we still fail.
But God is good and faithful, He provided us with the best role model- Himself. He never tires of forgiving us despite our repeated mistakes. So whenever I find it hard to forgive, I remember the Father's sacrifice when He sent His only son Jesus to die on the cross so that I may be justified from all my past, present, and future sins. And just thinking about it never fails to bring me to tears of immense gratitude, and helps me find the courage to do the same...
Good night!
Good night!
